This morning my allocated breast cancer nurse rang me up to make an appointment. This is when it all became real. After booking her in to come and see me on Monday I went and laid in bed and sobbed for about an hour. It really hit me, that I had breast cancer, and the fear was overwhelming.
All the negative thoughts raced through my head, my poor husband who I’d only been married to for less than 3 months, what if I was going to die, would he be able to pay the mortgage without me, what if Chemotherapy made me lose my hair and he’d not find me attractive…. I know this all must sound silly but the ‘C’ word, Cancer there I said it, is bloody scary.
So anyway, after my tantrum of tears I then realised that my periods had come so maybe I was over-reacting a little bit and all I needed was a bar of chocolate. But, in the fear of dying I decided to only put fruit, veg, pulses and nuts into my body so a bar of chocolate was out of the question. So I went crazy and opted for a cup of calming Camomile tea. Which actually worked!
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